The Clinical Starts Now

Oh my, with much anticipation.... the clinical time is finally here
but the first week of clinicals is really not as wat i was expecting......
i was lethargic and tired becuz i wasn't used to waking up so early to go to ward round.

i am actually abit guilty that i wasn't really involved in the ward.
well...to give myself a little excuse
i slept late+ woke up early+ it's the time of that month + there's some factor of adjustment= lethargy

the consultant surgeon of the cardiothoracic team was not back from holiday. thus the ward was pretty quiet. but i know i shld be more proactive in terms of learning. there's so much more in the ward to learn other than the Operating Theatre but i'm juz too tired.
also reading thru the program guide has stressed me out as well. there is so much to achieve.

when arranged tut was cancelled bcuz some big shot kidney transplant is happening and all registrars and consultants don't wanna miss it. i felt so dumb standing with the rest of the lost med students in the middle of gen surg ward. waiting and asking blindly. and everyone we asked is as lost as we are. gen surg ward is so crowded that i can't wait to get out of it.

hopefully, next week will be better. hoepfully, i will have a clue of where i am heading to.
i shall stop whining here. everyone has their own problem. while mine seems the whole world to me, it may be juz a tiny little biji sand to others.


Change your heart
Look around you
Change your heart
It will astound you
I need your lovin'
Like the sunshine

Everybody's gotta learn sometime
Everybody's gotta learn sometime
Everybody's gotta learn sometime

Change your heart
Look around you
Change your heart
Will astound you
I need your lovin'
Like the sunshine

Everybody's gotta learn sometime
Everybody's gotta learn sometime
Everybody's gotta learn sometime

I need your lovin'
Like the sunshine

Everybody's gotta learn sometime X 8

i juz wanna say that whoever i have neglected unknowingly, i'm so sorry. the time when u needed me most, i'm not there for you. i'm so sorry. i'll make up for it.
but at the same time i need some truth and openness here. if you don't open up, i'm not always by your side, how am i supposed to know that you are in trouble.........

i can always be a listener....is that what you prefer?!!!!
i know advice is always hard to take......but that is what i feel is most productive......
but it doesn't seem to register in you...........
i really hope that you shouldn't distant fr all of us just because of one event of misunderstanding....
that's all i have to say for now.

some how i felt hurt when i found out bits and pieces by myself that you did not want to meet me. well...u could have just told me up front instead. well at the same time, i don't wanna hold too much expectation of you as i always advice you to. in fact, there's nothing much i could do about it. it's all up to you...........